Sasuru
by Tsuonae
Summary: Some things, no matter what happens, don’t ever change. And no matter what happens, we wouldn’t want them to. SasukeNaruto. LeeSaku elements. Light Shonen Ai. RR.


Oneshot, slight angst, WAFF (tsp.) I think I have a thing for morning after fics. Their so fun and easy to write and I love the angst. This is practice for a part of my writing I need a lot of work on. I'm on a writing spree right now—never know, mgith even get to KMKuromi. This is basically everything I have to say on this pairing; I like them but without Alternate universes they're fairly simple.

Disclaimer: Tsuonae does not Own Naruto. Do not sue me.

Sasuru: _Japanese_: to rub or chafe, to be abrasive

Teme

Aa

**Sasuru: Ramen and Cold Coffee**

By Tsuonae

Sasuke woke up to the feeling of being warm. Strange, he was never warm, he knew that he always awoke from his dreams freezing, lacking the self preservation to lift his blankets over his head at night. Instead of the smells he was so familiar with; the rich dusty smell of his own home left to him by his parents, something foreign hinting at lilac was invading his senses.

A brief flash of blonde hair, tickling his face from below came to him; a memory. That memory seemed disturbingly close to his current situation. Someone was curled around him, arms bound around his waist, gently holding him there. Another flash; the swift impression of cerulean blue eyes smiling up at him. His eyes flew open. What the hell was that?

"Mmm..."

The husky voice drew his eyes downward, dangerously low on his own body and had not the others body blocked him, he would have been staring down at himself nude. He was pressed against this other person, Naked. Sasuke went rigid for a moment before the younger boy snuggled up to him murmured contentedly again and moved his face to the side.

That wasn't possible. It just couldn't happen.

It had. Sasuke stealthily made his way from the bed, easing his way out of the post-coital induced hold. After all these years he was still a better ninja than Dobe. Even if the annoying blonde outranked him by far in enthusiasm for his work. Grabbing an errant pair of jeans from the night before, Sasuke didn't care to check whose they were, he doubted Naruto would mind if he took his clothes for a day.

Closing the door behind him with care as to not make a sound, Sasuke surveyed the hallway. It was small, two rooms to his left and to his right was an open doorway that he assumed was the living room, judging from the dilapidated old couch squatting by the front door. Moving through the apartment, he found a tiny Kitchenette.

The room wasn't much, it was open to the living room and consisted only of a small, conservative fridge, a cupboard above the countertop, a sink, a microwave and a small coffeepot. The area was miniscule, barely enough to fit in the table in the corner and the two chairs. It was comfortable though, homey; it gave off the feel of being well lived in for years, its occupant at ease with everything here.

It was disconcerting that he could be so comfortable in this strange apartment; Naruto's apartment. He had never been here, hadn't known where Naruto lived and had never truly shown an interest. After they'd both become Jounins Naruto had never lost his vivacious attitude, but he had become more secretive...Or maybe he'd been that way all along and Sasuke had just never been able to notice.

Avengers didn't need to take notice of friends. Or rivals.

Sitting down, his chin resting in his hands. The room felt like Naruto. The pile of Ramen cups on the counter was just so him. The cupboard door had been left open from the day before and Sasuke could see a half-opened bag of chocolate snacks of some kind, yet another source of Naruto's everlasting energy. Yet he knew that somehow it was more than that. Naruto was made of that energy, he couldn't imagine him without it. He'd seen Naruto happy, sad, angry, and everything in between in the six years he'd known him and been on his team; he never had

once lost that energy.

So caught up in his own thoughts, Sasuke did not notice the silent presence that now watched him benignly form the doorway, simply watching him faze in and out.

Naruto...He had always been passionate; when he said something he meant it, it was always heartfelt. Naruto who'd he'd never known to be anything less than naive even when he was flipping off teachers and painting the Hokage monument. Naruto who he remembered being inside of only the night before...Moving so deep, watching that sweet mouth open and spill out endlessly cries for more while he...

Sasuke grabbed his head, pressing desperately his fists to his temple. He couldn't think about that. He was never supposed to get close to anyone. Naruto was the closest thing he could call a best friend, it was unfair for this to happen. He wasn't supposed to remember how sweet and tight he had...

Sasuke let out an unintelligible groan of frustration, borne of anger and hatred of himself. Turning to his old standby had to work, he wasn't ready to do this, least of all with another boy. This just couldn't be happening...

"Sasuke?"

Sasuke nearly convinced himself that it really couldn't be happening in the five seconds it took him to recognize the voice calling him now. He turned his head. Naruto was standing there in a nearly see through over sized white shirt and hastily put on boxers. He really did look good like that.

Naruto was biting his lip, but his voice came out soft and caring, not hesitating despite what it must have taken to say it. "Do you need to leave now?"

There it was; Sasuke was being offered the easy way out, and Naruto knew it. Sasuke didn't think it was in him to answer, not when Naruto was standing there so sweet, Cerulean eyes peering back at him and the adorable blonde hair sticking out at odd angles. "Naruto...I...We---" Sasuke cut himself off, not having any idea what he was supposed to say in this situation.

Naruto seemed to nod, as though accepting that as a perfectly legitimate explanation and went to stand in front of the coffee maker, pouring in a cup of water and turning the burner on. "I'll see you at training Sasuke, alright?" Naruto looked up, giving Sasuke a dazzling smile that nearly took his breath away. There was something different about that smile, some strange element that Sasuke found hollow, barren compared to the smile Sasuke was so used to seeing.

As though he was on auto, Sasuke made his way to the door, stunned. What was happening? Naruto was not in that smile; that wasn't the Naruto he knew, so sweet, loud, and annoying. Sasuke didn't look back as he left the small apartment.

The morning was warm, humid, but you can't see the sun, the entire sky is gray. It's almost summer, and if it had been any other normal day, Sasuke would have been looking forward to relaxing in the shade with Naruto after a sweaty practice. The last two years they'd gotten so close, they were best friends; and still he kept his distance. It had been Naruto to bring him back after he'd left the village, who'd dissuaded his away from Orochimaru. Naruto had truly been his salvation; what kept him grounded. Thinking of him as more than that went against everything he was; he'd trained himself to be independent.

Avengers did not need lovers, or any connections for that matter.

Yet there Naruto had been, defying all logic; always bringing away from his thoughts, violently fighting his musings away in the heat of their training. It had been so soothing. Naruto had always worried for him, always cared. He had never once thought that people actually cared about him, not before team 7. Naruto had cried when Haku had put him to sleep...So had Sakura, but she was more like a sister than anything else, especially now.

Naruto cared for everyone, though. Naruto, the one person who carried a homicidal demon inside him and had been shunned by the entire village; the one person who by all accounts had a valid excuse to hate the world, cared. It was ironic, really.

Sasuke had been given everything from birth, even after his parents death, he had the advantage of being the sole Uchiha heir and that commanded respect; and he hadn't cared, after their death no one mattered. The world itself could have imploded in a giant bloody massacre of pain and suffering and he wouldn't have gave a damn.

It seemed as though Naruto had given him caring. He cared now, even just a little, about whether his friends died. He was with the others when they went out to drink to say goodbye when Shikamaru, or Neji went on ANBU missions. Everyone went out when he and Naruto were given missions as well; amazingly, the entire group had defied all odds of being rivals, hating and envying and fighting; they were still together.

Truthfully, he didn't think he'd care, just as long as Naruto was there. He could survive if one of his friends came back dead one day soon; as cold as it sounded. Naruto would be there. He would mourn for both of them.

Looking up from his thoughts, Sasuke realized he had been walking for several minutes. He was standing in front of the Ichiraku...His stomach growled. He hadn't eaten breakfast yet. The night before they'd been celebrating Lee, Shino and Ino's return from a mission. It had been actually the first time in a while that they'd gotten together; they'd separated into their own little groups for a while and things inside the village had been hectic as new negotiations were still taking place with the Hidden Sand and Gaara being the newly elected Kazekage of the sand. Temari was expected to arrive in the next few days as well...

Pushing thoughts or work and Naruto from his mind, Sasuke approached the counter. "One Miso Ramen," The old man nodded and turned to the stove but Sasuke was too preoccupied to notice. Staring blankly at the old marble of the counter, Sasuke thought back to all the times he'd been here. How many times after training had he and Naruto come back here, and even farther back when Sakura had followed blindly after them as she fawned over him.

"Lee-Kuuuuuuuun...! Come on! I wanna eat before training!"

Aa. Sakura. After the attack on Konoha she had been more and more occupied with her training. And even after that, when he'd been gone she had thankfully lost some of that childish crush she'd had for him. Sasuke was loathe to admit that Lee actually didn't have it that bad; Sakura wasn't nearly as annoying anymore.

"Sakura...We're going to be late anyway; and you did say you wanted me to train you..."

Sakura had wanted to get stronger, and being lacking in her Taijutsu, and Lee had been the obvious choice. Of all his...What he supposed were friends, Lee

had surprised him the most. Being a year older than most of them, Sasuke hadn't realized that despite Gai's influence he was a lot more mature than the rest of

them; he was good for Sakura.

After being permanently injured form the Chounin exams, Sasuke had expected him to abandon becoming a Chounin; but he'd gone beyond that. Lee was strong, and though now he would never be as good at Taijutsu as Gai-sensei was, he was better than most. With a more rounded training program, he was one of the top ranking Jounin, not quite an ANBU.

Turning, Sasuke watched, amused, as a beaming Sakura lead in a bemused Lee. It must have been a nice change for him; after chasing around Sakura for all those years that she adored him so now.

"Two pork Ramen, please!" Turning Sakura spotted him. Just wonderful; a headache this early in the morning. "Sasuke!" Lee smiled apologetically at Sakura's enthusiasm and Sasuke absently admitted she was better now that

she wasn't so obsessive.

"...Sakura, Ohayo."

"Yesterday's party was so much fun! It was so nice seeing everyone together again, its been a while."

"Aa. Sakura, has it occurred to you that Lee just got back from a mission and he might need some rest before you go training?" Ha, that would keep her occupied for a while. Lee now had a sheepish smile on his face, blushing slightly as Sakura fussed over whether he'd had enough sleep and why he hadn't said anything. She really wasn't that bad; just very once in a while when she got really happy, she acted like she was 12 again; he supposed it was sweet, in an odd way.

Sasuke took thoughtful bite of his ramen, watching the two talk. They complimented each other; years ago he never would have seen them together but as they grew they changed and they fit. Sakura was not obsessing in the way of all teenage girls as she had before, not so desperate to make herself a focus. Sakura had gained a confidence as she grew older; it suited her. Lee was more down to earth; though he still valued Gai sensei as a teacher and now as a friend, he had grown into himself. Thanks to him, Sakura was now a talented Taijutsu specialist in her own right; not quite up to par with Gai and Lee but an important asset to the village.

"Lee, Sakura; I'll see you later."

Sakura nodded absently to him and Lee smiled understandingly. "Bye Sasuke, Say hello to Naruto for me too, won't you?" Sasuke had to fight from hunching his shoulders. Damn, Lee knew way too much, much more than he had way back when. A not so welcome improvement to Lee's character.

Sasuke reluctantly nodded as he made his way to the assignment office. He didn't take notice of the Ramen bowl he'd left practically untouched, and he didn't notice that Sakura's face was sympathetic as he left.

As soon as he got in sight of the office he changed his mind. It had become a habit to go to the office every morning, just to get a mission to keep him busy. Though there hadn't been any from the Hokage, he didn't want to take the chance this morning. Something told him that his situation would not get any better if he left the village for any amount of time. It had been years since he'd gone to Orochimaru, and he got important missions now, he was trusted. He couldn't remember a single mission that he'd had recently that Naruto hadn't gone with him.

Not that he didn't understand that. It was an unspoken understanding that Naruto was the future Hokage; he was one of the strongest nins in the village. Sasuke almost believed that Naruto had made some sort of agreement with Tsunande just to confirm that...Almost. But it was a widely believed fact; though the village still hated Naruto, no one could deny he was one of the best. And Sasuke was his rival.

In some strange way they fit together.

Not for the fist time Sasuke pointedly ignored the significance of that statement.

Kneeling down, Sasuke vaguely noted that he had somehow made his way

to Naruto's own peaceful place. This spot seemed to resonate with the blonde's energy. How many times had Sasuke seen Naruto just sitting up here, watching the village from the Hokage monument. It should have been unnerving, that he had left to get away from Naruto to think and here he found himself in a place that was so obviously his.

It was still early, the morning moist and dreary, as though compelling him to find his own peaceful place far away from such morose weather. Sasuke didn't pay attention to the slick stone of the monument, unconsciously holding himself back from slipping with chakra.

Lee and Sakura. He had never thought that would happen, and yet just a few

years after the exams things were a lot different than he would have imagined. He would have thought that he'd have died, the last of the Uchiha and fulfilled his only obligation as an avenger, died at peace. Itachi was dead, Orochimaru was gone; still, he wasn't at peace. The demon brand still marred his neck, but he knew it to

be inactive, a grim reminder of the mistakes of his past.

Strangely, he was the one who had betrayed the village and no one blamed him, and conversely, Naruto had remained loyal, putting his life itself on the line and still he remained a demon in their eyes. Fools.

He wanted what Lee and Sakura had, in some perverse way. For all that he had avoided human contact, all that he had tried to push everyone away, he remained. Naruto had refused to be deterred and somehow Naruto had wrapped himself around Sasuke, around his life and everything shined with his energy, like new; and Sasuke had known himself forgiven.

Naruto had forgiven him.

For betraying the village.

For betraying him.

"I left him there, and he just smiled at me..." Almost unconsciously, Sasuke spoke in a hushed tone to the monument, aware of Yondaime's presence directly below him. 'Naruto...' Running a hand through his hair, he groaned, frustrated. Everything always had to be complicated it seemed. Naruto himself was complicated, though he didn't act like it. Naruto was a contradiction, a shunned child, an innocent in a village of killers, the village that was supposed to be a symbol of hope to all of the fire country.

Dobe.

But this time he wasn't sure which one of them he was talking about.

He could be so stupid sometimes. Naruto could challenge the world itself to give him a challenge and he would lose and come out smiling. Because Naruto was complicated. Naruto was forgiveness.

"I never did meet you for training, did I, Dobe?" Kuso. He'd left Naruto there, smiling like he always did. Had Naruto gone to training? Had he truly expected him there? "You always have to make everything complicated, don't you Naruto?" Sasuke sighed as he put his hand down. He owed Naruto a little more than that...He had to find out what had happened, and he needed to know...

Because maybe this time, Naruto wouldn't forgive him.

Naruto POV

Naruto was still sitting at his kitchen table. His coffeepot was gently humming, but it didn't give him the comfort he was used to. Normally, he would be talking a mile a minute and that dull _whirr_ would give him a sense of right; knowing that every morning that sound would be there.

It was different this morning. He had spent the night with Sasuke, after a night out with the gang. They hadn't been drunk; Naruto never would have done anything knowing Sasuke was unaware. The look of pure confusion, that sense of being lost was so familiar to him, and it hurt to know that was exactly what was reflected on Sasuke's face as he left.

Naruto knew this feeling too. He felt so alone right now, despite the calm picture he must have made, silently stirring his coffee, staring out the kitchen window at the dull sky outside. It wasn't a good day for training, the entire world contradicted his outlook, it brought him down. Even if the weather had been decent, Naruto doubted he would have been able to summon the strength to go to the training field.

Absently, Naruto doubted Sasuke had gone to training either, so he felt no guilt over leaving him hanging for their daily sparring match.

Sasuke had left a little more than two hours ago, and Naruto couldn't remember if he'd taken a sip of his coffee the entire time. The steam that had been stinging his eyes as he'd sat down had dissipated, the cup now a dismal gray from the milk; cold and bottomless. He'd probably have choked if he tried to drink now; let alone trying keep anything down.

It was a sick feeling, almost nervousness, the queasy feeling of his stomach falling out, but more than anything else it was solitude. He had wanted Sasuke to come back; but he'd gone after him too many times now. No matter what Sasuke did he would always forgive him and he would never blame him. Because Sasuke was loved.

It was too much to ask for Naruto to go and seek him out now; to be rejected

then would be too much and he would not subject himself to a possible public humiliation. Hadn't he given enough that he deserved, just this one time, to not forgive?

Maybe he wasn't giving Sasuke the credit he deserved. Now that he thought about it, Naruto didn't think he could classify that expression on Sasuke's face, knowing what they'd done. Wasn't sure he wanted to. Would Sasuke be surprised right now, to see him without his customary smile? He didn't feel he had the energy.

On a normal morning, Naruto would have gulped down a boiling bowl of Ramen and a half stirred cup of coffee and run headlong for the training field. Ramen was for good days, for days he wanted to be nice, that he wanted to fortify himself against whatever awaited him outside.

He didn't want to be hopeful today, he found himself at home, and in no great hurry to leave this depression. Sasuke had left; and he wasn't ready to see what came next. Not ready to see what the world outside his home would fling in his face.

At the almost inaudible click of the screen door, Naruto lifted his face.

And it began again.

Sasuke stood in the doorway, staring at him.

For a moment Naruto saw the expression of uncertainty on Sasuke's face, and under normal circumstances that would comfort him; to know they were on a level playing field. That really didn't help though.

It didn't matter if Sasuke was here because he understood, because he regretted, and Naruto didn't care that Sasuke was feeling insecure right now. Now was the time to lash out, to feel hurt and pain and anger. Even so, Naruto couldn't find it within himself to strike out; he was angry, and would have loved to beat the hell out of Sasuke for just walking away, for once again taking Naruto at face value and thinking everything was fine.

But he didn't.

He just sat there, in his old kitchen, the dim light shining in, staring at the dark-haired boy that had burst in on him.

Looking uncomfortable, Sasuke glanced down at his feet for only a second, though it may have been Naruto's imagination. Sasuke's eyes fixed on his face and in some backward part of his mind that wasn't obsessing at that moment, Naruto noted that Sasuke was uncertain, but he was also calm. What he came here to

say he was going to say.

And yet those red eyes gave it all away. He hadn't ever seen those eyes so lost, not even when they had been black, and even back when he remembered them blood red and burning.

Sighing and shaking his head before Sasuke could begin, Naruto turned back to his coffee cup. That was Sasuke; everything he did had to be heroesque; he had to play the part of the perfectly composed Uchiha heir. That facade had faded in front of him years ago; so meaningless that it had no effect on him anymore. That bastard image of Sasuke that he hated.

"You never went to training?" That was almost funny. All that had happened underneath the surface that morning and he goes for the last thing on his mind. Naruto's face showed no sign of his thoughts.

"Neither did you..." Sasuke was hesitant, but he made his way over to the table, when Naruto made no move to stop him he sat down, the same chair he had pushed away earlier in his haste to leave the apartment. "I took a walk. Visited the Hokage monument...I almost stopped in to the assignment room, but I figured I could put off my next mission for a while; Tsunande's been promising us a leave."

Sasuke only did that when he was worried, or nervous. He talked a lot, not rushed or anxious, but calmly. He only did that around Naruto, though. It was unspoken between them, but they both knew that Sasuke never went on missions without Naruto anymore; they made a good team and balanced each other too well for Tsunande to separate them. For Sasuke to decide on a solo mission after all

these years would be to break all trust with Naruto.

Naruto almost gave Sasuke a skeptical look but stopped himself. He could

be cynical later. As good as it would feel to knock all of Sasuke's delicate little defenses, his walls down, at least one of them had to have partial control right

now. He was hanging by a thread of his sanity...Sasuke could talk for now,

explain himself, then Naruto would have his say.

Standing, Naruto filled a pot with water from the sink, lighting the stove. "I'm gonna make some breakfast." Naruto grabbed two ramen packages from the stack on the counter. He didn't turn but he knew instinctively that Sasuke nodded, and he would continue talking.

The beep-beep of the microwave seemed to echo through the kitchen, eerily loud in the silence. As the light came on and the humming started, Naruto turned around, arms braced on the counter.

"I'm mad at you, y'know." Said so matter-of-factly.

"I know." And now it was Sasuke's turn to look down at the table.

"You're a Teme."

"I know." Sasuke's head went lower, but still Naruto wasn't satisfied.

"That was mean and cruel and you're stupid for running and I never want you to do that again." A knot was forming in Naruto's throat even as his fists knotted on the counter, and his face was heating up. "Don't you ever leave me alone like that- not like that…!"

"I know." And this time Sasuke looked up, his eyes suspiciously bright. "And I'm sorry."

"Well I don't forgive you!" Naruto flung the words at him like insults and for a moment Sasuke seemed struck.

Shaking his head to himself, a self-mocking smiles appeared on Sasuke's face, and his expression was sad when he looked up. "I know. It's okay." And Sasuke walked over to Naruto, his arms going around the shorter boy. "You don't have to."

Half choking on a sob Naruto buried his face in Sasuke's jacket. "I hate you, y'know."

"I know." Sasuke was petting Naruto's hair, ignoring the beeping of the microwave.

"Okay, then."

And a muffled chuckle came forth but there was no way of knowing which one of them it was. It was a hopeful sound, happy, if a little choked. Not forced or sad. Because that's what they were.

Some things, no matter what happens, don't ever change.

And no matter what happens, we wouldn't want them to.

_Fin_

Teme- Bastard

Aa- yes (male form)

Dobe- Idiot

Ohayo- hello

Kun- term for a male peer or less/affectionate term. Kind've like male form of chan.


End file.
